Monday, March 17, 2014

52 Lists: Week 10



Breakthrough. Light. Plant. Fellowship. Servant.

Have you ever encountered a day that seemed like a week or a week that felt like a month or a month that seemed like it was a year? 2014 has carried that feeling since day 1, but this week particularly conveyed itself as such. So much occurred in such a short time--not only in what my eyes could see, feel, and touch, but in my heart as well.

Like a sudden springtime rainstorm arrives unexpectedly, yet timely—bringing growth to the earth below, so it was with my life this past week. There was breakthrough and revelation. My prayer was for clarity and a clear insight into two relationships. I knew that I was at the point where I needed supernatural understanding to cut one off in order to move forward. I wasn’t aware of which relationship was to progress and how I would be completely certain. That is, until this past week. I saw true colors. Ugly colors. Beautiful vibrant colors. Colors completely out of the ordinary. I was able to see the heart in both of them. I was able to see what was there all along (or wasn’t there for that matter).

This breakthrough switched a light on in my heart. I had the “ah ha” moment and a smile of utter delight overwhelmed me. Here before me was someone with the heart of a servant. Someone who though beautifully flawed, desired to grow—to move forward—to live out his faith. He, unlike the other, was planted and rooted deep in the truth. He followed through and did things before I asked him. Complaining, unlike myself this week, rarely came out of his lips.  I was astounded and my jaw was left hanging in utter amazement.

This new-found friendship and fellowship has been a joy! I have been left saying: Wow. Huh? I never would’ve guessed it, but I think I have a crush.

It’s humorous what a week can do, isn’t it? So, week ten has been one of lighted breakthrough that has planted me and awakened my heart to true servant fellowship. May you also keep digging deep and discovering the precious insights and revelations around you!


Until next week…

Wednesday, March 12, 2014

52 Lists: Week 9



discipline.
liberty.
undiminished.
expose.
patience.

What a week! And I'm behind. The words above summarize last week--one of unexpected delights and frustrations. But all the while, I have been coming eye-to-eye with discipline--training, adversity to improve behavior. I've been tested on what love is and living it out in my own life as I never have before.

Like a marathon, it hasn't been a picturesque or beautiful sight. Many times through this week, my heart has been exposed and released of the toxins it has contained: selfishness, abrasiveness, and criticalness. The mud has been in my eyes. My breath has been short, but I continue to run forward. I've wanted to give up. I've wanted to throw in the towel. But love doesn't do that. Love is patient. Love is long-suffering. Love just loves. 

So, my heart is called to be an anchor: steady, even-tempered, quiet, certain. As a child who is told to sit still for the first time, so my heart has been whirling around--desiring to get up, move, and push out all of those who consistently fail in my expectations of them. But love doesn't do that. And I am called to this higher place--patience.

Love doesn't diminish. It's undiminished. It lifts up and calls others to come up to higher places. It encourages and builds up. Like a hot air balloon blows hot air into its vessel--causing it to go higher and higher, love does the same. It blows upon the hearts of others and gives them the liberty to keep reaching upward--to elevate itself vertically. It doesn't keep a record of wrongs or love when it's convenient or when the love is reciprocated. Love just loves.

And so--though I am deeply flawed, I am called to do the same. It's not convenient. It rarely is. It's not easy. I've found it can oftentimes be challenging and difficult. But I'm called to love just the same...

..Especially when everything around screams for me to stop...

Determined to love fully. Completely. Wholeheartedly. Unreservedly. Exploding into the depths of my very being.

Learning to Love Outside the Lines,

Hellen