Say it. Speak up.

I've recently been on a John Mayer kick. I've been listening to him non-stop. Next to worship music, he has been the current and up-to-date singer blasting through my stereo. There is an album that he wrote a few years ago. It was about love and the difficulties of it. There is a specific song that talks about saying what you need to say.

Take out of your wasted honor/Every little past frustration/Take all your so called problems/Better put them in quotations/Say what you need to say

Walkin' like a one man army/Fightin' with the shadows in your head/Livin' out the same old moment/Knowin' you'd be better off instead/If you could only/ Say what you need to say

Have no fear for giving in/Have no fear for giving over/You better know that in the end/It's better to say too much/Than never to say what you need to say again

Even if your hands are shakin'/And your faith is broken/Even as the eyes are closing/Do it with a heart wide open/A wide heart

There have been many times in my life where I've gotten my "foot in my mouth" because I've said too much or more often than not, I had spoken the truth, but at the wrong moment. I've seen relationships come and go in my life due to this, but one thing that I'm grateful for is this: I never held back. Each person knows how I feel and where they stand with me. I say what I need to say.

Gracefully stumbling across my words. Sometimes hesitantly with hands shaking. Boldly and confidently speaking from the heart.

In a day in time where we are becoming more and more self-consumed and less relational or communicative, I encourage you today to "say what you need to say"! Speak up. Speak from the heart and say what needs to be said. Have the difficult conversations. Have the good and delightful conversations.

Because we have this life and it's a gift. It's momentary. Embrace it and embrace others with love.

Romance: Found in the Acts of Kindness

For me, romance isn't an over-the-top act. It's someone offering to help and to support me. Or if that person thinks I'm making the wrong decision, he'll tell me. I want him to be honest, because being that honest takes a lot of guts. 

This morning, as I stumbled out of my bed and set my coffee to brew as quickly as possible, my tired eyes came across this matter-of-a-fact quote from Thora Birch. Upon reading it, my eyes opened and I received a bit of revelation on romantic relationships: Romance is in the mundane. It's in the simple acts of kindness where love is found. 

As each moment trickles down, there is an opportunity for growth or decline. I can either offer kindness or hurt. I can choose selfishness or selflessness. I can choose honesty or deceit. I can choose to work through it by verbally communicating or I can shut down with determined silence. I can offer courage or cowardice. Either way, romance is found in the "everydayness" of life. It is found in the acts that I think don't make a difference. 

From experience, those are the key life moments that I remember. Yes, I remember some beautiful large grandiose acts of love, but I would say that more oftentimes than not, I recall the small amorous endeavors that beautifully have interrupted my day.

As a single woman, I would agree with Thora Birch's quotation. What I desire to have in a romantic relationship is just that: support, help, honesty, kindness. But as a bold woman, this can be difficult to convey to the opposite sex. Dating relationships are a learning experience--learning another person and the best way to communicate with them. Relationships also pull on my own insecurities or weaknesses, as well as exemplify my strengths. It's work and requires effort from both individuals. But as the relationship evolves, I have the opportunity and gift to develop more. 

But the biggest question is this: Will I take on the commitment and allow myself to grow in the process? 

Love is a choice.

Romance. It is truly discovered and found in the simple acts of kindness.